Dancing Towards Abundance
I have been striving for as long as I can remember.
Constantly driven to learn more, give more, create more, challenge myself more, plan more, say yes more — all focused on bringing my absolute best self to every moment and endeavor.
Where does this drive come from? Perhaps it’s an appetite for control and self-reliance, my latent perfectionist tendencies seeking external validation, or a false definition of success engrained in me from our capitalist society. For the time being, let’s leave the root of my relentless striving to my therapist and ongoing introspection. What I’m doing with this realization is where we will begin.
This past summer, I found myself depleted of the internal motivation I’ve come to rely on while smack dab in the middle of all-consuming burnout.
I chose to navigate the past two years by doing what I have always done best — filling every possible moment with doing. Full-time job with a new leadership position, growing and guiding our now global Motivated Community, developing a new emerging artist mentorship program, and serving on two nonprofit boards all while trying to be a present and caring wife, daughter, sister, and friend.
At first, I was thriving. My days were filled with dance, serving community, incubating new ideas, creating meaningful content and conversations, developing my skills as a leader, and expanding my limits of what I thought was possible. It was intoxicating, really. The ideas flowed out of me, the coffee poured into me, and there was rarely a dull moment during our days of hibernation.
And then the inevitable happened.
Pretty quickly I started resenting my triple-booked calendar, found a new level of exhaustion in my body, and reached my breaking point. Not only had I stopped fulfilling my obligations to the best of my ability, I realized I wasn’t showing up for myself in the way I deserve.
I have big dreams. I have a lot to give to this world. And I seek an abundant life filled with meaningful relationships, creativity, community, joy, gratitude and wellness. So I keep striving, keep growing, and keep pursuing new challenges and opportunities. I keep doing.
But my plan is not sustainable. There has to be another way.
Cue my dear friend, Anna Scott. I was pacing back and forth along the lakeside trail in Chicago talking in spirals about all of this with Anna. We had spent the summer clarifying and redefining our values for Motivated Movers which led to exploring the word abundance. What that value means for our Motivated Community you can read here, but on this day Anna asked me to share my personal definition of abundance. (Her clever way of helping me step out of the swirl and look at what my heart actually desires.)
My personal definition of abundance? Stay tuned. I’m still working on finding the right words.
But as we kept talking I started realizing my path towards abundance to this moment in my life had been centered around doing as much as possible to create financial wellness, contribute to community, and continually grow as a human. It’s not sustainable.
This is the part you realize that I am the person in school projects who ended up doing the most work, whether it was needed or not. When I see a ball dropping, I pick it up not because it is my problem to solve but because I want to prove to myself that I am capable. I give far more support than I will ever ask or accept for from another. I am a chronic doer and giver.
But is that really the path to abundance?
Anna asked me to close my eyes and imagine a hot air balloon:
What if abundance is like that hot air balloon? What do I need to soar?
Suddenly it clicked. What if the path to soaring is in letting go of the weight, the expectations, the need for external validation, and anything else keeping me from rising? What if I start getting real with myself and prioritizing what matters most? What if abundance is not at all about doing more, looking outward, and striving? What if it is about looking inward, letting go, and finding wholeness?
What if the path towards abundance is entirely different than the map I’ve been following?
It’s hard to articulate, but my intuition is telling me that abundance is like a hot air balloon. That it is about rising, not gathering. That it is in letting go, with the right design and support, that I will find the space to soar. To embrace my wholeness.
I have a lot of questions inside of me and very few answers. But I’ve started this journey of letting go and have found one compass to keep me exploring and looking inward — dance.
When you don’t know where to begin, start with movement.
And that is why I am sharing this story with you today. This exploration has resonated so deeply with Anna and me that we want to invite you to share in the journey with us– a quest to evolve our personal definitions of abundance. Together we will ask the questions, process through dance, and share our experiences with one another along the way.
What does dancing towards abundance feel like?
In The Motivated Community Hub, we are introducing themes designed to help us consider and question. We certainly don’t have the answers and are confident there is no one definition of abundance. But if we invite the space for introspection and exploration, perhaps we will each discover something new about ourselves.
Our 2022 theme, Soaring Into Abundance, will be the compass. You will be your guide.
Will you join the journey?
xoxo
Elise